I Am The One Who Knocks?

Answer The Question

What episode is I am the one who knocks from

Character Development and Arcs – Even his own wife is now deemed unworthy to speak to him in such a way. At that moment, she no longer stares at Walt, but Heisenberg. Instantly, her concerns about Walt’s safety are flipped. Just in a brief moment of silence, & Skyler’s face, we see the realization.

Clearly, she is now the one in danger. Throughout Breaking Bad, characters are having to adapt to new situations and setbacks. It’s how they process these events that makes their development interesting to the audience. When it comes to the series overall one can struggle to identify good guys from villains.

This is perhaps the show’s primary agenda, to blur these lines. Aside from those completely outside of Walt’s operation (like Walt Junior), you could consider most of the key characters as villains, though all have some redeeming qualities. When it comes to Walt and Skyler specifically, they’re both far from perfect at their core.

• Taking a look back at the first episode, we see just that.
• A scared man in his underpants, about to end it all.
• At that point, he was everything Skyler said he was, ‘In over your head’.
• Now in S4 E6 (the episode of the ‘I am the one who knocks’ scene), he’s grown into something completely different, both personally & mentally.

The worse aspects of himself have come to the fore.

What is the best monologue in Breaking Bad

“I am the one who knocks.” – Season 4, Episode 6 The most famous Walt quote has been celebrated by fans and inspired an homage by Samuel L. Jackson. Breaking Bad writer Gennifer Hutchison, who wrote the episode, told THR she didn’t realize the monologue would become iconic. “It was always a cool scene.

What does Walter White mean by I am the danger

The first meaning is of course that he is the danger for everyone else and that they should fear. But the second meaning has much more impact on Walter himself. He’s the danger to himself (ego) and that’s why he wants to get bigger and get recognition for his work.

Why is Walt a villain?

Why Walter White Is Worse Than (Almost) Everyone In BCS – Better Call Saul, with its Walter White cameos, showed that Walt was far worse than all the villains on the show. In Breaking Bad, His crimes, legal and moral, were more treacherous and insidious than anything figures like the Salamancas and Gus Fring did.

1. His fake confession tape, which directly lay the blame for his drug ring and murders on his brother-in-law Hank, was brilliant, but ruinously manipulative.
2. He threw his own family under the bus to prevent Hank from reporting him to the DEA.
3. When Jesse’s girlfriend Jane was overdosing and began to choke on vomit, Walt had a choice, and chose to watch her die because it suited his agenda.

The poisoning of six-year-old Brock was done purely to coerce Jesse by turning him against Gus. His abuse of his wife Skyler, with gaslighting, assault, harassment, and emotional blackmail, demonstrated that not even his loved ones were safe from him.

1. He involved himself with Neo-Nazis to further his plans, and he bombed a nursing home just to kill Gus Fring.
2. Every one of his bad acts were in service to his ego, and the bigger that became, the greater his depravity.
3. Better Call Saul shows Walter White was not an antihero – something that can be harder to see in Breaking Bad, as viewers begin with his sympathetic origins.

He was a villain, and worse than every other villain in Better Call Saul because it wasn’t about business, as it at least was with Gus Fring. It was personal. He committed atrocities because it suited him, no matter who the victim was. In Breaking Bad it was easy to lose sight of how dark Walt goes, even up to the end, but in Better Call Saul, with just a few scenes, it became apparent that he was the worst one of them all.

Was Walt always a bad guy?

Yes he sure was. There was always evil inside of him, he is a narcissist and all it took was being introduced to something that finally would fulfill his deep, empty core.

Who is smarter Gus or Walter

Walter White was a greater genius, in terms of intellect, but Fring was a far more effective drug lord. Fring set up a world-class chain of distribution, married to a German conglomerate, played the Cartel, then buried its kings, built the super lab and had the business savvy to run this thing in perpetuity.

Why did Gus cut Victor’s throat

Why Victor Was Killed In Breaking Bad – The decision of why did Gus kill Victor is even more chilling given their history. As revealed in the prequel series, Better Call Saul, Victor worked for Gus long before the events of Breaking Bad, By season 3, Victor watched over the meth superlab where Walter White (Bryan Cranston) and Jesse worked as part of Gus’ operation.

When Gale Boetticher (David Costabile), another chemist, was introduced into the fold, Walt worried that he would be killed and replaced with the newcomer. Walt devised a plan to kill Gale, making him the sole person to lead the meth cooking, but Jesse wound up doing the dirty work. Jesse shot and killed Gale at his apartment before Victor arrived to stop him.

In the Breaking Bad season 4 premiere, “Box Cutter,” Walt and Jesse were held hostage so that Gus could punish them for their actions. While waiting for Gus to arrive at the lab, Victor cooked his own batch of meth to prove that he studied Walter White’s meth formula.

1. Rather than target Walt and Jesse, Gus entered and cut Victor’s throat with a box cutter before telling his employees to get back to work.
2. The druglord was unhappy with the fact that Victor was spotted at the scene of Gale’s murder by neighbors, essentially putting the entire operation at risk.
3. Ultimately, however, why Gus killed Victor, his longtime ally, also held a deeper meaning.

As with everything Gus Fring does, it was a cold, calculated move.

Why is Breaking Bad a classic?

T en years ago, Breaking Bad made its TV debut. A comic drama starring the dad from Malcolm in the Middle, it answered the question middle-aged men had asked of themselves for generations : what would happen if I quit my boring job and became an outlaw? The answer, it appeared, involved drugs, mobile homes and being stranded in the desert in your pants.

1. First impressions of Vince Gilligan’s now seminal drama may have been misleading, however.
2. By the end of the pilot episode the protagonist, Walter White, had murdered a man.
3. His initial adventures may have had a slapstick air to them, but it soon became difficult to laugh.
4. That tonal trick, to make you think you were watching something less challenging than you actually were, was just the first of many Gilligan pulled.

He would play with perspective, style and structure over the course of Breaking Bad’s five seasons. Most of all, he would play with the way he presented his characters, persistently challenging the viewer’s preconceptions. By the time the show came to its end in 2013, the klutzy Walter White had become the ruthless Heisenberg,

But even in his denouement – as he bled out on the floor of a neo-Nazi meth lab – many viewers still found themselves rooting for him. The whole thing was about transformation. But Breaking Bad was also emblematic of significant changes in TV and culture as a whole. When White and Jesse Pinkman first appeared in 2008, the Sopranos had just ended, Mad Men had just begun and we were in the throes of what soon became known as the ‘ golden age of TV ‘.

Breaking Bad is now rightfully placed at the top of this category, but it would likely never have existed had US cable networks not been seeking to imitate the success that edgy, creative driven dramas had enjoyed on premium channels such as HBO. (For a sense of how fraught the pitching process was before AMC finally agreed to make the show, watch this interview with Gilligan). Skyler White (Anna Gunn) and Walter White (Bryan Cranston). Photograph: Frank Ockenfels/AMC In 2018, the TV landscape is very different. What was an abundance of TV a decade ago is now a deluge, with the landscape now dominated by Netflix (at least, it seems that way – we don’t really know because the digital broadcaster does not release viewing figures).

Cable TV, meanwhile, is struggling to keep up. This has had effects on the way we watch, with appointment-to-view being replaced by viewing on demand, and box set binging a common and encouraged practice. Binging would have been the way many UK viewers got to know Breaking Bad, after Netflix acquired the rights to the previously unseen seasons, and put them online before streaming the final eight episodes in weekly chunks.

We are also surrounded by difficult men. This was the name given by author Brett Martin to antihero such as White and Tony Soprano, but also their creators Vince Gilligan and David Chase. No longer unconventional, however, the antihero is 10 a penny, from The Blacklist to Preacher to Narcos.

• Gilligan, meanwhile, has chosen to go another way.
• Better Call Saul, his ongoing drama that serves as a prequel to Breaking Bad and centres on its amoral lawyer Saul Goodman, is a study not of the will to power, but of managed disappointment.
• It tells the story of people who wish they could become something else, but can’t.

(One thing it has in keeping with its predecessor/sequel, however, is a keen eye for the strengths and tensions of personal relationships.) Despite all the Heisenberg T-shirts and mugs, Walter White didn’t endure because of his villainy. If you were still on his side as he died, it was because of the humanity that poked out despite itself.

Which is the saddest episode of Breaking Bad?

1 Hank Schrader’s Death – While there are plenty of tragic moments throughout Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul, none are more tragic than Hank’s death in Breaking Bad season 14, episode 5, “Ozymandias.” Hank’s relationship with Walt was tumultuous throughout the show’s run, which is what makes Walt’s reaction to Hank’s death so impactful.

What is the most iconic Breaking Bad episode

Season 5, Episode 14 (2013) – IMDb Rating: 10/10 There is only one television episode with a perfect score on IMDb, and that deservingly goes to “Ozymandias.” The highest-rated Breaking Bad episode and in TV history, the episode is a knockout emotional rollercoaster and a masterclass in dramatic storytelling.

After a shootout that kills Gomez, Walt offers his entire fortune to Jack to spare Hank, but Hank is shot in front of him. Walt’s money is taken, Jesse is taken prisoner to cook meth, and Walt tries to flee with his baby daughter in a dramatic showdown with his family. The stakes have never been higher in this perfect episode of TV.

NEXT: The Highest-Rated TV Episodes on IMDb

Why did Walter White call himself Heisenberg?

The nickname ” Heisenberg ” had a deep significance in Breaking Bad, serving as a mirror for Walter White’s true identity and allowing him to gain notoriety while keeping his true self hidden. Walter White chose the alias “Heisenberg” based on the German physicist Werner Heisenberg, using it to separate himself from his actions and suppress guilt, reflecting the famous uncertainty principle associated with Heisenberg’s work.

1. The alter ego of Heisenberg represents Walter White’s dark side and his transformation into a ruthless criminal, ultimately leading him to lose sight of his old self and embracing his criminal persona.
2. The Walter White nickname of “Heisenberg” was memorably used throughout Breaking Bad and the name had a deep significance.

Bryan Cranston portrayed the character for five seasons of the AMC series and one of the most compelling arcs of the award-winning show focused on Walt’s transformation into the ruthless drug kingpin named after the historical figure,.

7/25/2023by Colin McCormick, Kara Hedash ScreenRant.com

Why does Walter White cry so much?

Breaking Bad: “Salud” (Episode 4.10) “There’s no place for emotion in this. You of all people should understand. Business is business,” says Don Eladio to Gustavo Fring. This is an important notion, and what has always separated Gus and Walter White from the rest in Vince Gilligan’s criminal world—they get emotional.

Up until this season, we didn’t know this of Gus. He was always so elusive and professional that we assumed he operated on a similar level of coldness that blocked out emotion. But as “Hermanos” showed us this season, much of Gus’ decision to cut off ties with the cartel and start a war with them was fueled by his need to avenge his partner Max, who was killed by Eladio’s men years earlier.

Similarly, we can look at Walter White and see that one of his glaring flaws is that he’s willing to break the rules when he takes things personally or needs to protect someone he cares about. All of this needs to be said, because Walter White and Gus aren’t so different after all.

And who wins the end game (if there is a winner at all) will largely be determined by the decisions they make and the alliances they keep. Up to Season Three, I would have argued that Walt and Jesse had something that others didn’t—undying loyalty to each other. For all the professionals Gus hires, if someone was willing to pay them more, or offer a better position, they would take it.

Conversely, the people that work for Gus really mean nothing to him the minute they screw up (see Victor). But with last week’s explosive falling out between Jesse and Walter, both of them are now in a similar position of not having anyone to really look out for them but themselves.

1. In many ways “Salud” was a very cathartic episode.
2. Walt, badly beaten and banged up from his fight with Jesse, looked completely broken.
3. When Walt Jr.
4. Comes over to visits him at his house on his birthday, he can’t help but be confused as to why his father is in such terrible shape.
5. Walt asks him to not tell anyone about this, especially Skyler, and makes up a story about gambling.

Walt Jr. still doesn’t understand why his dad got into a fight and asks him who he got in a fight with. Whether it’s the question of who, or the fact that Walt just can’t keep up with the burden of lying anymore, he just bursts into tears and weeps like a child.

“I’ve made a mistake. It’s all my fault. I had it coming,” Walt confesses. Walt isn’t just crying because he’s ruined the only real relationship he had (both business and personal), but he’s crying because he’s realized the mess he’s made of his life, and those around him. For once, he’s taking responsibility for everything he’s done and recognizes himself as the problem.

Walt is barely able to stand up, but he clings to his son and cradles him as he breaks down in tears. After Walt Jr. tucks Walt into bed, he starts to doze off. Talking to Walt. Jr about his birthday, he finally says “That’s nice, Jesse” and falls asleep.

• The allusion to Jesse being his son was heart- breaking and wasn’t the first time Walt has done this.
• We can recall back in season three when Walt shared a beer with Jane’s father and talked about never giving up on family.
• Walter didn’t just lose a business partner in last week’s episode, he lost family—and perhaps the only family member he can really be himself around.

Jesse finally lands in Mexico, and upon his arrival at the cartel’s lab, he’s greeted with hostility. Not only does he not look like a chemist, but they can tell he’s not one. Channeling all of Walt’s teachings over the years, Jesse has his “student becomes the master” moment and yells at the chemist about how poor their meth is, scolding them for having such a dirty lab.

He then orders them to clean up the lab before they can start the cook. This was an extremely satisfying moment in the episode, as we got to see Jesse finally take charge instead of always taking orders from someone else. It was also nice to see Jesse that took a lot away from his time with Walt. After they finally cook, they test Jesse’s meth, and it comes up to being approximately 96 percent pure.

With Gale’s being 97 percent pure and Walt’s being closer to 99 percent, it still shows that Walt knows how to cook the purest meth. But 96 percent is still unheard of, and the cartel celebrates. Jesse then gets a surprise when Don Eladio tells him that he’s staying in Mexico to cook for them full time.

• After Walt wakes up, he immediately tries to do damage control.
• His concerns over his masculinity and being a provider for his son are so important to him that he tries to scramble to explain to his son that it was the painkillers he was taking that made him act funny.
• Walt, doing what Walt does, starts to make up excuses for why he was crying.

He launches into a story about how the only memory he has of his father is his dad dying in a hospital completely empty and devoid of life. He talks about how he always tricked himself into believing that he remembered his father by all the things others told him about him.

• But the truth is, he only remembers his father in his dying state.
• In a brilliant scene, Walt says, “I don’t want you to think of me the way I was last night.
• I don’t want that to be the memory you have of me when I’m gone.” Walt Jr., perplexed by what his father is saying, replies, “Remembering you that way wouldn’t be so bad.

The bad way to remember you would be the way you have been this whole last year. At least last night, you were real, you know?” This was easily one of the best dialogue scenes on the show to date, and it really showed how much Walt just doesn’t get it.

He’s so preoccupied with trying to be this image for others that he forgets that his own actions are what will he be remembered for, not the image he projects of himself. It’s hard to say whether Walt actually learned something from this exchange or if his breakdown over Jesse will actually translate into him changing his attitude.

I hope so. The tragic thing in Walt’s story is that he had to be told what his father was like as he was too young to really remember him. And in a way, he’s doing the same thing to his own family. The episode ends in Mexico. Slipping a pill into his mouth, Gus stares out at the pool where his partner Max died years earlier.

Eladio and his men finally walk out and want to start a celebration. Jesse, still on edge over having to say in Mexico, is reassured by Mike that they will all leave together. Gus presents Eladio with an expensive drink as a sign of respect. After passing it out to all of his men (including Gus), they all take a drink and the party begins.

Don Eladio asks Gus why he looks so glum and tells him to not take their recent attacks personally. Gus, excusing himself to the bathroom, begins to vomit out his drink (remember the pill he took). Suddenly, everyone at the party is getting sick. Gus, the mastermind, has not forgiven the cartel.

• There was never a plan to cave in and make nice; it was a mission to hit them back.
• In a poetic fashion, Don Eladio dies and falls into the very same pool Max’s blood spilled in, as Gus looks on in rage.
• Despite taking the pill, there are traces of the poison in Gus, and Mike and Jesse have to help him to a car.

After Mike gets shot, Jesse takes his gun and without hesitation kills one of the cartel’s men. Hopping in the car, he speeds off and gets them out of there. “Salud” was Breaking Bad at its best. It had profound dialogue scenes that really examined the characters and their motivations, breathtaking performances from Cranston and Mitte, and an explosive ending that had your heart racing up until the screen cut to the credits.

It’s still hard to say what direction they will go with Walt. It’s clear that he feels like he’s lost everything by losing Jesse. But with Jesse doing extremely well on his own, and Gus having a plan to get Jesse out of there with them, it’s hard to imagine where Walt fits into all of this. As Walt Jr.

pointed out to his father, Walt needs to start being “real” with Jesse if he wants to fix this damaged relationship. And if my theory is correct and Walt does in fact have cancer again, he doesn’t have very much time left to make his move and find whatever redemption he is seeking.

And with one season left, it’s hard to imagine Walt in such a broken and beaten state. But you know what? He needed it. Walt’s cleansing in this episode will perhaps be the revelation he needed to see more clearly. Stray observations: • I happened to like the re-introduction of Ted and his tax problems last week.

It raised the stakes and could have been a huge game changer. However, I did not like how Skyler handled it at all. Telling Ted outright that it was her money? What was she thinking? • I wonder if Ted plans on extorting money from Skyler. If Walt finds out, who knows what he will do.

• Maybe the best solution would be to kill Ted.
• Mike’s relationship with Jesse has really grown this season.
• It doesn’t seem like a front either.
• So I think this is a very important relationship to keep an eye out on.
• I could see Jesse eventually turning on Gus.
• But I have a hard time seeing him turning on Mike.

• Gus had the opportunity to kill Jesse with the poison, but didn’t. : Breaking Bad: “Salud” (Episode 4.10)

Why is Walter White laughing

First being diagnosed with cancer and other series of events, then with his last bit of stash gone, he just burst in laughter feeling the agony. If you look at the whole aspect, Vince Gilligan has put in all kinds of emotions throughout the series.

Is Walter White a sociopath

I’ve answered this before, but no he’s not a sociopath. He can feel empathy and remorse, even as it degrades as the series moves along. A sociopath wouldn’t be capable of those things. He is a narcissist though, and that’s made incredibly clear as the series moves along.

Why does Walt have a black eye?

It was Hank who took away his children when he threatened to leave. It was Hank who used $177,000 of drug money to pay for physical therapy. It was Hank who gave Walt the black eye when he tried to get out.

Why does Walt have a fake eye?

What is the meaning of the toy eye that Walter keeps? I have frequently noticed that an artist, an author, a sculptor or anyone in the creative field may be able to analyze and/or explain their art, but frequently overlooks what another, an unknown third party viewer may be able to see.

No pun intended.) Yes, the eye of the once perfect pink teddy bear, the eye that is forever lost to the teddy bear and the teddy bear itself, forever lost to one child or another, may symbolize what one character IS able to see and what another character may not notice at all. The son has MS, the Mother commits illegal acts at the accounting firm, the DEA brother-in-law steps outside of his legal boundaries, purposefully with no remorse.

Every character on the series has a flaw, but it seems as if Walt may be the only one to recognize his own flaw and yet continue to act in a manner in which he knows is wrong. He keeps the eye for a few reasons. He wants to remind himself that what he is doing IS wrong, and to never take it for granted that it is in anyway OK; he recognizes his own flaws and does not want to forget.

He is fearful, in hiding, that more than the teddy bear’s eye will see him, so he even tries to hide that eye from time to time. Walt understands that no-one and nothing is perfect Curiously, it is only one eye and not two that are lost from the stuffed animal so the animal is never rendered fully (and symbolically) blind.

So too is true of the character Walt. Even the bear, in its burnt (out) and seemingly no longer worthwhile position (now debris and seemingly worthless when at one time the bear was a treasured possession), part of this pink broken bear still has worth.

Walt does not want the entire bear to “go away” just to be replaced by another toy. He keeps the eye, without realizing, that he is attempting to keep some value unto himself knowing that even the flawed are worthwhile. With the eye as his superego as well as his reminder of the fact that all will be lost to him one day,Walt “holds on” to what is real and what is perception.

: What is the meaning of the toy eye that Walter keeps?

Does Walt become a monster

Breaking Bad is an excellent examination of the corrupting force of money and power, and here are 10 ways Walter White got worse as time went on. Walter White is one of the most iconic characters in the history of television. He is the perfect example of an anti-hero who does some horrendous things yet was beloved by everyone who watched Breaking Bad — for the most part, at least. He drastically changes from the man who appears in the first episode, and, while they make him a fun character, they don’t necessarily make him a better one.

Is Saul worse than Walter

While Walter damaged society more with his drugs, Saul was the worse person. Saul would run over anyone to get ahead. He had it made, and he blew it up for greedhe just couldn’t help himself.

Does Walt ever betray Jesse?

Anything goes as the show ties up plot line after plot line, hurtling towards the finale The worst-case scenario doesn’t even cover it. Call it the Walt-case scenario. Gomez dies. Hank is executed in front of Walt as Walt begs for a reprieve. Laughing Nazi sociopaths loot Walt’s money.

• Walt betrays Jesse, hands him over to be tortured and killed, and reveals that he knowingly let the love of Jesse’s life die for good measure.
• Marie and Skyler tell Flynn the truth about his father.
• Jesse is consigned to a life of torture and slavery under the watch of an emotionless child-killer, with the lives of his ex-girlfriend and her little boy in the balance.

Flynn finds out his Uncle Hank is dead, then is forced to break up a knife fight between his mother and father and call 911 to report Walt for domestic abuse and murder. Walt kidnaps Holly. Walt calls Skyler to lambaste her for her disrespect, call her a bitch, tell her and Flynn and Marie that Hank is dead at his bidding, tell them they’ll never see him again.

Relive the 10 Most Revealing Prior ‘Breaking Bad’ Murders “Ozymandias,” the Shelley poem that soundtracked the trailer for these final episodes and which gave last night’s Breaking Bad episode (written by Moira Walley-Beckett and directed by Rian Johnson) its title, evokes the abject ruin to which a once-great man’s empire and pride can be reduced.

Well, this was abject, all right. The truly remarkable thing about this episode is the speed at which it escalated, or sank. It’s as though the gunfight that ended last week’s installment blew away the show’s last vestiges of restraint in showing just how bad Walt has broken.

1. Now, anything goes.
2. Now, they can smash his blue-meth monument to atoms.
3. Credit the pacing of the episode with that sense of total freefall.
4. Maybe half a dozen moments that had been built to for ages, that could have served as the anchor point for an entire episode apiece, were fired right at us in rapid succession.

How long had we waited to see Jesse find out about Jane, to see Walt Jr. find out about Walt Sr., to see who would be left standing in the final Walt/Hank and Walt/Jesse showdowns, to see the final break-up of the White family? We got them all. There was just no weathering all those body blows without crumpling at some point.

Why did Walt nod at Jesse at the end

Jesse just wanted to enjoy his life in his own way. So Walt nodding to him and saying nothing at the end was also a way of showing Jesse he had changed. Just as he finally admitted to Skylar why he cooked. He wasn’t suddenly a good man, but he rescued Jesse and tied up some loose ends for what he had started.

What is the knocking quote in Breaking Bad?

(2011) –

: Walt, please, let’s both of us stop trying to justify this whole thing and admit you’re in danger! : Who are you talking to right now? Who is it you think you see? Do you know how much I make a year? I mean, even if I told you, you wouldn’t believe it. Do you know what would happen if I suddenly decided to stop going into work? A business big enough that it could be listed on the NASDAQ goes belly up. Disappears! It ceases to exist without me. No, you clearly don’t know who you’re talking to, so let me clue you in. I am not in danger, Skyler. I am the danger. A guy opens his door and gets shot, and you think that of me? No. I am the one who knocks! : Walt, I’ve said it before, if you are in danger, we go to the police. : Oh, no. I don’t want to hear about the police! I do not say that lightly!

: ” ” Cornered (TV Episode 2011) – IMDb

What does Walter mean when he says I am awake

I Am Awake One of my favorite television scenes ever comes from Breaking Bad (in fact, most of my favorite scenes come from Breaking Bad). During the first or second episode, Jessie asks Walter why he has suddenly decided to cook meth out of nowhere. Walter looks at him and says simply, “I am awake” (click for the gif), and leaves his explanation at that.

We are led to ponder what this means, and why the prospect of going out in the “boonies,” as Jessie would say, to produce crystal meth excites him so. In one way, his answer is completely understandable, replete with meaning. He is awake–his cancer has sparked the thirst for life and clarity of vision that had eluded him for so long in his humdrum, suburban life.

But at the same, time his answer is completely inadequate. Jessie, who expects a predictable response such as “I need money” or “I’m bored and want excitement,” is left gaping in his car as Walter walks away. I find the scene unique and universal at the same time.

1. Obviously, no one is in Walter White’s position; no one knows what it is like to be a sick chemistry teacher who desperately needs to make money for his family.
2. But at the same time, I imagine that all of us at some point have experienced the thrill of a lifepurpose dawning in one’s conscience.
3. Perhaps some huge change or event has occurred, revolutionizing our outlook and thoughts and attitudes.

Either way, the outcome is a renewed and empowering sense of agency. I thought of this moment from Breaking Bad because I feel this sense of agency right now. This semester is proving itself to be quite the sequel to fall of 2015, the most significant event of which was the end of a serious relationship.

1. All that I have become and all that I am experiencing now stems from that one night in September when I decided to go my own way.
2. The consequences were many and the life lessons were profound, but mostly I am eternally grateful.
3. I would not be where I am right now without that difficult decision in September.

And if anyone asks how I am doing so far this Spring semester, I would tell them, “I am awake.” I find it funny that I feel this way, considering the fact that I don’t get enough sleep and last semester’s beautiful blocks of free time have been replaced by 9 AM classes and Sunday-night cramming sessions.

Perhaps these little annoyances occur precisely because I feel awake now. You see, I’ve always been content to keep to myself, stay in my room, dream passively of some ideal moment in the future that would come to define myself and my life. I think too much and hesitate to act, to write out my own story–I let other people write it for me, and defer to them out of misplaced kindness.

I see my friends often but prefer solitude; I love succeeding but hate taking risks. I need perfection to feel happy; I need to look good and do well and make sure my life proceeds exactly as planned. But now, my senior year looms and my 21st birthday is coming up.

1. I am high on the inebriating sensation of independence that has resulted from my decision to be single again.
2. I feel young and empowered and I have imbued every second of the day with importance and purpose and urgency.
3. These are the days to be spontaneous, to prioritize special moments with friends over work that can be done (if not rather shoddily) the night before class; to experiment with habits you’ve never tried before*.

And not just conventional, goody-goody, I’m-being-a-better-person habits like going to the gym or reading every day–I’m talking about speaking ugly truths and wearing clothes you’d never wear and striving to find peace during the morning-after of a messy, forgettable night.

When I say I feel awake this semester, it does not mean I feel happy, or content, or fulfilled, necessarily. It just means that I am aware, in a way that I never have been, of the delicate potential in every second to feel the direction in which my life is going, and of the power to alter this direction for the simplest of reasons: because I can.

*Obviously I don’t mean doing drugs or doing unsafe things or whatever. : I Am Awake

Why did Walt start punching his reflection?

Walt Could No Longer Use His Cancer As An Excuse For His Actions – More than anything, Walt used his cancer as an excuse for maintaining his secret life as Heisenberg because he figured he didn’t have much time left. As the family patriarch, he needed to make sure his family would survive without him, and in his mind, that meant money.

Walt realized while in that bathroom that this justification was gone. Every decision he made following that moment was for his own interests because he could have walked away at that point. The reason for joining the drug trade had vanished. His death would neither put an end to his lies nor did he have any drive to stop cooking meth.

For the first time in Walt’s life, he found something he was good at, but it happened to be extremely dangerous for him and his loved ones. It’s likely that Walt targeted the towel dispenser with his outburst because he saw his reflection on the metal.

1. Through Walt’s Heisenberg transformation, he quickly became an almost unrecognizable figure in his own mind.
2. Going from Walt the family man to Heisenberg wasn’t an easy task, but it was clear that the character started to enjoy his increasing power.
3. It was no longer just about his family, and admitting that was difficult for Walt.

He knew that he would edge even further toward the point of no return without the finite conclusion of death from cancer. Interestingly enough, Walt encountered the towel dispenser again in Breaking Bad season 5, episode 8, “Gliding All Over.” He smiled at the dented dispenser, thinking about how far he’d come.